Are you still stuck on your ex? Are you trying as hard as you can to get over your ex but it isn’t working? Do you wish you could move on and find someone else but are having no luck? Do you wonder what your ex is doing and if they are having a good time while you are miserable? Has your ex moved on but you feel the same way as you did when you were together? Do you find yourself so stuck on your ex that dating someone else feels pointless? Does it drive you crazy that no matter how hard you try they thoughts of your ex keep haunting you on a daily basis? It really sucks when you are stuck on your ex and just can’t seem to take even one step forward.
It is ok to still have feelings for an ex. It is ok to have a little hope in your heart that you may reunite.It is not ok is to put your life on hold while your ex lives theirs. Being stuck on your ex is self-destructive. You need to seek closure. Closure is not an easy thing to get, it doesn’t come fast and it doesn’t come without pain. It also doesn’t just come with time, it comes with effort.
The passage of time doesn’t give you closure, it is what you do with that time. If you keep allowing yourself to dwell on the good times, or wonder all the time what they are doing, you will get nowhere. You can’t control when thoughts of your ex pop into your head. What you can control is what you do with those thoughts. When they pop in, instead of grabbing that quick thought and now making it an hour-long internal movie, do something else. You don’t need to relive the past. You already lived it once, and once was enough.
Taking daily long strolls down memory lane isn’t going to help either. You have to train yourself to push them out of your mind as quickly as they enter. Put on your favorite music and blare it if you have to, just don’t put on anything that reminds you of them. Call a friend to listen to them talk and don’t let your mind wander. Don’t let the people you know talk about your ex, that will just keep you stuck. Don’t ask people about your ex either. Drop the subject entirely.
Ask people to stop pushing you to date right now, it will only make you think of your ex and stay stuck. If they are on your social media accounts, delete them. Who cares if it hurts their feelings, worry about your state of well-being. Don’t check their social media accounts, that will always keep you stuck on your ex. You don’t need to see their life, you need to work on your own.
In order to get to a point where you will no longer be stuck on your ex, you have to learn to let go. You have to let go of the dwelling, remembering, daydreaming, spying, worrying, and just accept that they are not with you anymore. They are not a part of your life, but you are making them a part of yours by staying stuck. It doesn’t make you a part of theirs. For all you know, they haven’t given you a second thought in weeks, months or years.
The truth will hurt, but when it is over, you have to live the truth, and not your fantasy. If they return, great. Live and enjoy your life until they do. Or, you could be miserable and let your life fall apart until they do. The choice is yours.