Many wives have asked us “Is my husband cheating on me?” Often a husband will think they are playing it cool and that their wives will never suspect them, much less catch them, when they have affairs. They think no one would catch on, but to the wives that have known their husbands for years, or decades, she can see the difference in him.
A husband may have excuses to explain his behavior but that doesn’t mean the wife is necessarily buying it. People don’t change overnight, so when a wife sees a change in patterns that occur suddenly, she may question him about it. His excuse may sound good to him, but wives don’t always let them off the hook just because they have an excuse. Sure, there are still plenty of wives who get the shock of their life when they find out their spouse has been cheating. These are the women that have said “My husband would never even think of cheating on me!” only to have it come back to haunt them later on down the road.
Wives seem to have gotten smarter and catch on quicker. Cheating is not as rare an occurrence as it used to be, and women know that. They seem to be more suspicious knowing that thanks to the Internet, cell phones, etc that cheating seems to be more prevalent. So when a wife suspects her husband is cheating on her, she begins to look for the evidence to prove it. She will try to check phone records, email accounts, Internet history, you name it. She needs to either prove or disprove her husbands cheating, and she will not rest until she does.
The thing is, no matter how much you may believe you are prepared to find out the truth, it still is enraging and horrifying if you do find proof that your husband is cheating on you. With that proof only comes more questions. How long has my husband been cheating on me? How many different women has he cheated with? How long has this been going on? Where did he meet her (or them)? How many times did they have sex? Was it unprotected sex? How could he do this to me and our family? When did he find the time to do this? How much money did he spend?
They want answers, and each answer is like ripping open a scab. Sometimes the answers give a woman a feeling as though they need more details, when the details don’t really do anything but prevent you from moving on. At some point, you have to say to yourself that you don’t need every single detail.
Sometimes a wife fears her husband is cheating on her when he isn’t. He may not be the kind of man who wants to share the pressure and stresses he is currently going through. Instead what he will do is get more quiet, and withdraw, physically, mentally, and/or emotionally. The wife may take this personally and wonder what, if anything she did to cause this. In truth, it has nothing to do with her. He needs time to solve or get over his problems by himself and when he does, things go back to normal. It could be a difficulty at work with a co-worker or project, it could be a health issue, it doesn’t always mean he has cheated. Before you make it or take it personally, first find out what may be going on with your husband personally.