Self entitlement has a way of sabotaging relationships. We should all feel entitled to love, and for someone to love us. Self entitlement often sets the stage for the ultimate destruction of the relationship. If only one partner’s needs and desires are important, the other eventually gets tired of it and bails. Dealing with a loved one with an unrealistic sense of entitlement is a big turn off. The behaviors seem childish, and the melodrama gets exhausting and boring after a while. If you don’t think self entitlement is sabotaging your relationship, you are dead wrong.
Let’s say you and your boyfriend text one another every day. Sure, to a certain degree you can expect to keep text with him every day, but you are not entitled to it. If, for one day, he cannot text message with you, and you get furious with him, you have no leg to stand on. Instead of appreciating how much he texts you, you have become Miss Self entitlement and feel it is your God-given right to have him text you every day. The punishment you give him, either by acting angry or shutting down is going to turn around and bite you in the ass one day. Your boyfriend will eventually see you as a high maintenance pain in the butt that he can never please. He will resent the fact that instead of being given credit for all he does you go bananas the one time he doesn’t. Was the argument or drama worth it for something so juvenile? Not in the long run it won’t be.
Another way self entitlement sabotages relationships is by being too pushy and bullying. Self entitlement will make a person feel as though they should always get their way. They don’t care if you really don’t want to do something, they will bully you until you do it. They will push, nag, complain or punish you until you do what they want. Of course that would make a person feel resentful and angry. A person with self entitlement will see absolutely nothing wrong with what they have done.
Too many people in a relationship with someone with self entitlement issues try to “keep the peace”. They want the arguing, badgering or punishing to stop thinking the relationship will be better if they do. In actuality, it is the wrong thing to do. The self entitled person in the relationship only learns that if they bully you, they get what they want. So they will constantly do it, because it works.
If you are in a relationship with someone with self entitlement issues, you have to create boundaries. You also have to have the strength to enforce those boundaries. You can never have a healthy relationship if you don’t. Nothing in your relationship will change or get better unless you stand up to a partner with self entitlement issues. They need to learn that you will not respond positively to negative behavior. If you are not prepared to teach them that lesson, how else will they learn it? They won’t.
Don’t allow self entitlement problems to keep sabotaging your relationship. Your loved one is usually not aware of the damage their self entitlement is causing, but it is happening whether they see it or not. So take charge and turn your relationship around before the damage can no longer be undone.