So many times people call us asking us will time apart help the relationship? Sometimes relationships need time apart to help the relationship get back on track. When things spiral out of control, sometimes it is best for the couple to separate and let things calm down a bit. When a relationship has problems and issues that are never resolved and more just keep piling up, things with only escalate. Having a simple conversation can lead to a heated argument. At times like this being together is really only leading to more fighting and doing more damage. Instead of continuing to hurt one another, it may be best for the couple to take a break.
But is time apart good for a couple? Will it help the relationship? First you have to look for the real reason for the break. If it has anything to do with seeing other people during that time, it is not good for the relationship. Keeping the relationship in a holding pattern while pursuing another to see if it goes anywhere is manipulative and deceitful at best.
To ensure the couple’s time apart has a benefit, it must be a reasonable length of time. If the relationship had been otherwise going well and a fight came up, a few days may be all that is necessary. If it has been especially bad, then it may need several weeks of no contact. Time apart must be reasonable as well. To ask someone to wait for an indefinite period of time means you really don’t want to work things out. Too long apart can hurt the relationship, and rarely does it help.
If a couple wants to create change within their relationship, the time apart should be agreed upon by both parties. In order to change from a dysfunctional relationship to a healthy functioning one, there should be some ground rules when the couple is ready to see one another again. Simply missing him or missing her is not going to change you as a person. Thinking “If he misses me long enough he will change” is also in many cases not true either. The point of time apart is to diffuse the emotions,have time to think and calm down, and decide what changes YOU should be making, and what changes you need the one you love to make. Just spending time apart is not going to cut it.
Time apart can actually help you see if breaking up is really the right option so you can then find closure.
Also check out our article: Why Stay in a Bad Relationship?