We have all heard of dysfunctional relationships, but what exactly makes a relationship dysfunctional? How do you know if your relationship truly is dysfunctional, or if you and your spouse (or boyfriend / girlfriend) are just going through a rough patch? A dysfunctional relationship is one that doesn’t work. The problems within dysfunctional relationships never seem to get resolved, they only get worse. Being in a dysfunctional relationship will actually change you, into a much more depressed dysfunctional version of your former self.
Most people involved in dysfunctional relationships don’t even know they are in one to begin with. They often are in a state of denial. Without recognizing you are in a dysfunctional relationship first, you have little or no chance of making changes in your relationship for the better.
Examples of Dysfunctional Relationships
- Living in a constant state of denial. Problems are not addressed or dealt with head-on, but swept under the rug. In a dysfunctional relationship huge issues are minimized, meaning the people involved act as if problems such as verbal abuse, physical abuse, and addiction problems either don’t exist or are under control, when clearly they are not.
- Dysfunctional relationships exist when nothing is sacred, and no line won’t be crossed. Boundaries, if they even exist between the couple are constantly overstepped, ignored, or challenged.
- History of cheating / infidelity within the relationship. This is when one or both parties in a dysfunctional relationship look outside to someone else to satisfy their emotional or physical needs and desires. Cheating becomes a part of the relationship in a way.
- Undefined status in a relationship. Are you married but there is no respect for the marriage? Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend yet act like you don’t? Does your boyfriend / girlfriend act like you are THEIR boyfriend / girlfriend? Are you unclear as to what the status of your relationship is?
- You have broken up as a couple and are still sleeping with one another or talking all the time and are in a “limbo” relationship.
- You both say one thing then either change your mind or do another. One, or both of you, may say one thing but do another.
- You break up constantly, and are in an on again off again relationship. You break up over the most minor of things.
- You fight all the time about the same issues over and over. Nothing gets fixed, new problems arise and it gets to the point where one or both of you is always angry.
- An ex, either yours or theirs, is constantly interfering with the relationship to the point where they are more in control of it than you are. (Or make you feel they are more important than you are).
- One or both of you don’t talk about what is bothering you. It’s just kept inside and that persons feelings are never addressed and then one day they either explode or just leave the relationship
These are just some examples of dysfunctional relationships. Dysfunctional relationships never get fixed on their own without making changes and putting in some work. As psychic life coaches we cannot simply wave a magic wand and make your dysfunctional relationship better. What we can do is show you what you and/or your spouse (boyfriend, girlfriend, whatever) are doing wrong and the steps you need to follow to make your relationship a healthy one. We don’t offer quick-fix solutions but reality based ones, so please understand it may take time to undo the damage.