If your soulmate gets back together with their ex, there is no doubt you will feel miserable. You check social media and see pictures of all the fun things they are doing. They are smiling, happy, and you want to cry because it is so painful to see but you…
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Valentine’s Day when you’ve broken up is especially difficult. Many people have experienced their relationships ending right before, or even on, Valentine’s Day! That makes Valentine’s Day especially hard to bear. It worse is when all you want is your ex back, instead of being angry at them. You hate being broken up and want to be back together.
You may think they have moved on and will be celebrating Valentine’s Day with someone else. It pains you to think of them happy with a new love while you still have not gotten the break up. You feel tempted to call them or text them and wish them a happy Valentine’s Day. But when they don’t answer the call or text, you wind up feeling even worse.
What are you supposed to do on Valentine’s Day when you have broken up and you are not over it yet? How do you handle it when it seems like everyone on earth but you is celebrating love with someone special? All you can think about is your ex and it hurts knowing they haven’t reached out to reconcile. It depresses you to know that Valentine’s Day could come and go without them thinking about you, especially since you cannot stop thinking about them. So is Valentine’s Day just a form or torture or a sign you need to accept that you have broken up and move on?
First, don’t let Valentine’s Day make you do something stupid. If your relationship has ended don’t let Valentine’s Day make you do something you will regret. Don’t let the sentimentally and the fact you are alone on Valentine’s Day make you lose your mind. Don’t forget the break up and why it happened. If you did it, more than likely you had good reasons to do so. Those reasons should not be put on the back burner for a 24 hour holiday. It more than likely took a lot of guts to break up with someone you still cared about, so don’t undo it based on a temporary feeling.
Let Valentine’s Day come and go and then use your brain, instead of your emotions, to look back on your relationship. If they broke up with you, focus on the break up. Did they have a valid reason for breaking up or are they just sabotaging what you could have? Do people break up with all the time for no good reason? If your answer to either of those questions is yes, then you need to take a more hardened look at your ex.
You didn’t deserve what they did, and you should not be ready, willing and able to sign up for that to happen to you again. Your ex is showing you who they are and you really should not like their real self. That part needs to change. You really need to put your foot down and change how you react to the break ups and your part of getting back together. Change your ways or they won’t change theirs and you will wind up spending many, many Valentine’s Days alone.
Don’t worry so much about them coming back, but worry about it getting worse the next time around, and do something different so they do something different. If you focus on creating change within yourself first, which can create change with them, you may never have to face Valentine’s Day alone again.
Are you still stuck on your ex? Are you trying as hard as you can to get over your ex but it isn’t working? Do you wish you could move on and find someone else but are having no luck? Do you wonder what your ex is doing and if they are…
Will your soul mate and his ex make it? For some unknown reason, that to you could never make sense, your soul mate decided to let go of your great relationship and try to make it with his ex. You remember his ex, right? The one they said treated them…
Will your ex remain an ex or will you get back together again? So many clients call us wondering if the status with their ex is a permanent one. For all the worrying, over analyzing and tears, one must remember that it is not certain that your ex will even remain your ex. The first thing you should take a look at is the relationship prior to the break up. Is there a pattern of breaking up all the time? Do you have an on/off relationship?
If you do, then you really need to stop telling yourself this time will be different and they won’t want to reconcile. Rather than think that, simply tell yourself the past will repeat itself and your ex won’t remain an ex forever. You can either worry your ex will remain your ex, or you can give yourself some hope. Worrying and thinking worst case scenario won’t guarantee they will come back, so what use is it to you?
There is nothing wrong with trying to stay positive. It can actually keep you from doing something stupid. When you let your mind wander to thoughts of your ex remaining an ex, you can work yourself into a tizzy. When that happens you could do something that could hurt your chances of getting your ex back. Best to stay on the side of caution.
Exes get back together all the time. The answer lies within the couple themselves. If there are still strong feelings of love on both sides, then chances are pretty good. Your ex might be angry with you right now, and that anger is all you see and hear. They may still love you, but they are not in a place right now to show it. They have to get over their anger first, so it would be very stupid to anger them further. If they are angry and want space, give it to them. If they are angry and don’t want to talk to you, then don’t try to communicate with them right now.
Give them the time they need, regardless of your patience level, because it could make things much more worse. Your ex may remain an ex if the anger keeps escalating, so it is best to let them calm down completely. When you try to talk to an angry person, all they are most likely to do is fight with you. So give the anger time to evaporate, so the love can be shown and felt again. Always remember, just because someone is angry with you does not mean they don’t love you anymore.
In some cases, with some couples, the time has come for an ex to remain an ex. If the relationship is too toxic and volatile the couple needs to let go, at least for a while. If down the line, they decide to reconcile with professional help, they may just make it. Without it, they are most likely to repeat the same behaviors only to wind up exes again. If you really want to make it work, seek professional help. You wouldn’t pull your own teeth would you? You wouldn’t fix your own roof or do surgery on yourself would you? No, you would leave it to the professionals. So seek their help if your relationship was out of control and you are thinking of getting back with your ex.
The bottom line is each couple has a different path. Some will get back together. Some will remain exes. But if you focus on yourself, and help yourself, you will be ok regardless of what the future holds.
Why stay in a bad relationship that isn’t working? Why would you stay in a bad relationship where things have only continued to get worse? Do you think your relationship is going improve by some miracle? Do you think if you hang on to a bad relationship somehow it will get…
Do you miss him and wonder does he miss you? Have you been trying to forget about your ex but finding thoughts of them keep creeping up on you? It’s hard to not think about an ex, especially when the break up is still fresh in your mind. We have a tendency to think about the good times, and how much we miss him. If you still hold out hope you may reconcile, you have the he will miss you too. When a break up happens, especially if it is unexpected, we focus on the good times and all the things we will miss out on. We forget about the red flags and recurring problems and instead often look back wearing rose-colored glasses.
It is hard when you wish you could have another chance but don’t think you ever will. Things with your ex might not be what they seem. Sure, you may be hearing how they have moved on. You may see pictures of them on social media smiling and looking happy. This makes you miserable because you miss him so much and it seems like he does not miss you at all. But how do you know that he isn’t just putting on a front and that those pictures are how he really feels? You would be surprised how often, out of the blue, an ex you thought had moved on comes back into the picture.
It is ok to miss your ex, but it is not ok to dwell on that. Dwelling on that not only keeps you from moving forward, it keeps you in a state of depression. You don’t get anything by self sabotaging yourself. Your ex is not going to come back out of pity. The universe isn’t going to take pity on you and bring them back either. You have to find a way to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and find a way to keep on the path to closure.
Almost everyone on earth has gone through a breakup, and some are worse than others. You can survive it, just like everyone else has. It takes time, and it is painful, but you deserve another chance at happiness, and you will find it, with someone new, or your ex if they come back. It may seem like an impossible task, and you may feel your life is meaningless without your ex. You have to stay strong, and you have to take it day by day.
You may believe your ex will never return, but you don’t know for sure. Don’t put yourself through all of that if you don’t need to. No one should hold on to false hope, but unless you know for sure, don’t just assume. Your ex may miss you as much as you miss him. They may have other reasons, rather than not just wanting to get back with you, for not coming back right away. Give them the time they need to work on themselves, and use that time to work on yourself. He may come back with a greater sense of clarity about his feelings for you and the future of your relationship.
There are millions of couples that have broken up and gotten back together. Not all of them got back together right away either. Time is not necessarily a factor in determining if a couple will try again. So remember, when you find yourself missing him, he may also be missing you too.
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